Here's the playbook for a guaranteed quick cash payout ordered by the Human Rights Tribunal against your woke company:

1. Go into work and announce you are now a woman and would like to be referred to as she/her.
2. Change absolutely nothing else.
3. Wait for the following conversation with management and HR. If they're slow with this step, a quick shit in the woman's washroom will force the issue.

HR: we think you are making a mockery of transgenderism and demand that you stop.

You: what makes you say that? I am 100% serious. I am a woman.

HR: you still dress the exact same way you did before you announced your transition.

You: are you saying you get to dictate to women how they dress and if they don't follow your beliefs, then they're not a real woman?

HR: no no no. Of course not. We would never say that. But ok, you still look the exact same. You're a 6'1 200 lb man. You clearly haven't even started hormone therapy.

You: I'm sorry, are you telling me it is your prerogative to dictate how and when trans women proceed with their transition? Are you telling me trans women aren't real women until they follow your prescribed process?

HR: no no no. We would never. Ok, so then what is your plan for transitioning?

You: not that it's any of your damn business, but I'm already done transitioning.

HR: SEE! SEE! We knew you weren't a real trans person. You can't go from a man to woman and remain a 6'1 person with 200 lbs of muscle. You're not even trying to look like a woman.

You: EXCUSE ME! First of all, I didn't go from "a man to a woman". I've always been 100% a real woman. Second, I just happen to love my muscular feminine body. Are you telling me Serena Williams isn't a "real woman" because she is much more muscular than most woman? Are you? Is that what you're saying?

HR: no no not at all. We'd never say that. But you're still married to your wife.

You: so now lesbians arent real women according to you? Ellen Degeneres isn't a real woman because she's a lesbian? That's both trans and homophobic.

HR: no no no, again that's not what we're saying. Of course lesbians are real women. But explain this. As recent as last week, we have received multiple complaints about you mocking the trans community. So you're obviously not really trans.

You: that was the outward manifestation of my internalized transphobia due to self hatred resulting from trauma cause by an overwhelming presence of transphobia in society. Kind of like the transphobia you've all displayed against me with this line of questioning. This is exactly why I've been afraid of announcing my trans status and why I've been forced to live a lie. I knew I'd face bigots like you who just can't accept that a 6'1 200lb married lesbian with a penis who likes masculine clothes, beer and sports and who is struggling with traumatic internalized transphobia is still A REAL WOMAN. This workplace is so incredibly toxic.

Cue lawsuit