Some key points about the Deadliest Virus Ever!
- Covid-19 is named after the amount of time it takes to die once infected. 19 minutes and BAM! DEAD!
- A single molecule of virus can self replicate along an exponential scale. One becomes 30 becomes 5 billion within minutes!
- the Media is your friend. They just want you to be safe*. Believe all news stories and ignore anyone who speaks against the Holy Word.
- Keep your distance from everyone. 90 foot minimum distance
- Don't touch anything! A fist bump contains enough of the virus to propagate through space/time, meaning that you have already infected people in the past by this time tomorrow.
- WEAR YOUR MASK! The only time it's not acceptable to wear one is never. Shower, sleep, alone in the basement, no matter when or where, you must be masked!
- Be arrogant at all times! Give a sneering gaze at non-maskers, and smugly remind them that tHeRe's a pAnDeMiC HaPpEnInG! i gUeSs yOu dOnT CaRe aBoUt tHe eLdErLy!
- Make a big deal about wearing a mask! Get one with funny slogans or pictures, because this is the new normal!
But most of all, remain scared and paranoid at all times. Hearing someone sneeze a block away is a guaranteed death sentence! Freak out, lose sleep, stay indoors, and never let up!
Remember, obedience brings victory, and victory is life!
*exceptions to the rules include liberal rallies, protests, and rioting.
I love how everyone becoming a hypochondriac is seen as a good thing in this new normal.
I have never worn a mask and I have never caught it, people who always wear a mask are 70-80% of positive cases, almost like they provide a false sense of security.
My Cap. and I used to do circuit workouts in the bay while our gym was closed and within a week he caught covid and I was fine, we shared the same bench, weights and other equipment literally 4 times a week. He was fine too and said he has had worse colds. So did my obese diabetic friend.